Your parents might have taught you to always say thank you, but even they couldn’t have known how powerful a lesson they were teaching. In order to thrive, you must be grateful.
Farmers can be skeptical, but research has proven it time and again. Gratitude is essential for living a life that is experienced as a good life. People who are grateful report being not only happier, but also healthier, more energetic, more productive, more helpful, less anxious and less depressed.
Robert Emmons, the world’s most prominent researcher and writer on gratitude, defines it as “a felt sense of wonder, thankfulness and appreciation for life.” And Sonja Lyubomirsky, who spent years studying happiness for her book, The How of Happiness, goes on to explain that grateful thinking bolsters our self-esteem, helps us cope with stress and creates closer friendships.
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But the first thing to realize is that there is a difference between saying thank you and living a life of gratitude.
It’s true that you will get a short-term sense of well-being from saying thank you, or when you pause for a moment on a deck chair on a mild summer evening to reflect on all that you have to be thankful for. But to fully enjoy the benefits of gratitude, you need to make it a habit.
In a study by Lyubomirsky, participants who kept a gratitude journal showed a marked increase in happiness over the control group.
Once a week, participants were asked to write down three to five things that they were thankful for. These could be big things or little things, and repetition was permitted. It also made no difference what time of day the exercise was completed — first thing in the morning, bedtime or at coffee break.
On average the weekly frequency was the most effective in Lyubomirsky’s research, but she says it’s up to individuals to find a pattern that works for them. And it’s also important to vary the timing so you don’t become bored with the exercise.
Sharing the activity with a spouse or other loved one can also strengthen both our appreciation and the relationship, Lyubomirsky adds.
Or, if you’re not a writer, simply make sure you take a few moments each week to pause and reflect on what you’re thankful for, because even that can also be beneficial.
Writing a letter of gratitude to someone important in your life is another way to boost both your own happiness as well as the recipient’s. Lyubomirsky recommends writing in concrete terms about what this person means to you. Then, if possible, deliver the letter in person and read it to them.
If that sounds way too gushy, write the letter anyway. You don’t actually have to send it to get the benefit from writing it. Lyubomirsky’s research showed that writing the letter without sending it still has a positive impact on the writer.
Gratitude, on the farm
Practising an attitude of gratitude shouldn’t be limited to our personal lives. Research shows that making gratitude part of your approach to the farm and your overall approach to work has many benefits.
When gratitude is part of your work culture, job satisfaction is higher and your family and employees will be less likely to look for another job, says social psychologist Dr. Vanessa Buote, who works with Plasticity Labs, a Kitchener, Ont. firm that uses advances in positive psychology to help companies boost morale and create a happy, healthy workforce.
Not only does this result in a happier, more productive workforce, it also saves money since it’s so difficult to attract and train new employees.
Striving to make gratitude a part of the workplace culture has other benefits too. Gratitude helps bind people together, Buote says. This in turn produces an enhanced sense of community, where trust and positive collaboration can flourish.
When people make a point of expressing sincere thanks, employees are kinder, and more agreeable, and there is less burnout. “People on the receiving end are more likely to pay it back and pay it forward,” says Buote.
Meet the real world
Even though practising an attitude of gratitude produces both a better work environment and also economic rewards, and even though it is relatively easy to achieve, most workplaces have a dismal record for expressing appreciation.
Studies show that one-third of workers never express their thanks to their co-workers or their bosses, says Buote.
Research also shows that when we get busy, expressing gratitude often goes by the wayside.
Gratitude can also be well or poorly done. The most important factor is that the thanks must be sincere, Buote says. Mindless gratitude doesn’t cut it.
It’s critical to cultivate a habit of mindful gratitude and to express what you are truly grateful for. “It can be difficult at first, but it gets easier with practice,” Buote says.
Elaine Froese, a Boissevain, Man. farm family coach, regularly encourages her clients to practice an attitude of gratitude. “Being grateful is a powerful attitude for family and business,” Froese says.
Froese’s mentor, business coach Tom Hubler, asserts that a lack of appreciation is one of the three major stumbling blocks faced by small and medium businesses.
Verbal affirmation is a great place to start, says Froese. Even simple things like saying: “The hot meals you brought out to the field tonight were delicious” or “Thanks for taking the garbage out to the burn barrel” can have a big impact.
“People appreciate being appreciated,” says Froese, who recommends sending thank-you cards to show your gratitude. “Getting a handwritten card is a rare thing these days,” she says.
Count your blessings. Showing our appreciation for those around us only takes a little bit of effort, but produces hefty rewards for your own health, and that of your farm team.
This article first appeared as “Thanks for everything” in the January 2015 issue of Country Guide
Tips for creating a culture of gratitude
From Dr. Vanessa Buote, psychologist
- Spend a few minutes at the beginning of staff meetings to reflect on what you are thankful for. This can be done privately, or people can be invited to share, although Buote recommends keeping it optional. “Don’t force it.”
- Take time to recognize others for their work. It will be most meaningful and effective if you’re specific.
- Bring in a box of donuts or find another way to show your appreciation for everyone’s hard work.
- Offer help or social support to co-workers and employees.
- Actively recognize it when people go above and beyond what’s expected of them.
- Hang a smiley face sign or other visual cue to remind everyone to practice thankfulness.
- Seek feedback on the best way to show appreciation. For example, would your team like a pizza lunch, or is there a better way to reward them?
